WastedTimes

[hbgator]

My next door neighbor is so blonde........

She sent me a fax with a stamp on it.

She thought a quarterback was a refund.

She tripped over the cordless phone.

She put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.

She told someone to meet her at the corner of "Walk" and "Don't Walk".

She took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.

At the bottom of the application where is says "Sign here", she wrote Sagittarius.

If she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless.

When she heard that 90% of all crimes were around the home, she moved.

She got an AM radio. It took her 9 months to figure out that she could use it at night.

When she saw the sign in front of the YMCA, she said, "Look! They spelled Macy's wrong!".

She stood staring at the frozen orange juice because it said "Concentrate".
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Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes twinkle?
A: Shine a flashlight in their ear.

Q: What does a blond and a soda bottle have in common?
A: They're both empty from the neck up.

Q: How do you get a blond out of a tree?
A: Wave

Q: Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?
A: To see what was on the other side.

Q: Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?
A: From crawling across the street when the sign said "DON'T WALK".

Q: Why did the blonde keep a coat hanger in her back seat?
A: In case she locks the keys in her car.

Q: Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?
A: So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills.

Q: Why did God create blondes?
A: Because sheep can't bring a snack from the fridge.

Q: Why did God create brunettes?
A: Neither could the blondes.

Q: Why did the blonde drive into the ditch?
A: To turn the signal blinker off.