WastedTimes

A man goes to confession at the Catholic Church.
'Father, it has been one month since my last confession.
I have had sex with Nookie Green every week for the last month.'
The priest tells the sinne ...

First Date

If you didn't see this on the Tonight show, I hope you're sitting down when you read it. This is probably the funniest date story ever, first date or not!!! We have all had bad dates bu ...

This guy was lonely and so he decided life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet.

After some discussion he finally b ...

Anna had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her and urging her to get back into the world. Finally, Anna said she'd go out, but didn't know anyone. Her daughte ...

lol, nice one brian. Razz

A drunken cowboy lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh Houston theater.

When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the cowboy, "Sorry, sir, but you're only allowed ...

Withouit a doubt , this has to be the best explanation concerning the
American Beer consumption theory.

Sometimes when I reflect on all the beer I drink, I feel ashamed. Then I
look into th ...

Three Rednecks were working on a cell phone tower- Cooter, Pete and K.C.

As they start their descent Cooter slips, falls off the tower and is killed instantly.

As the ambulance takes the body aw ...

A blonde's car gets a flat tire on the Interstate one day. So she eases it over onto the shoulder of the road. She carefully steps out of the car and opens the trunk.
Takes out two cardboard men, unf ...

Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place. Looking up to heaven he said, "Lord take pity on me. If you find me a parki ...

Nice find bossman, that was great!

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go on a camping trip, set up their tent, and fall asleep.

Some hours later, Holmes wakes his faithful friend.

"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you ...

Tyrone asked his work buddy, Robert, one morning, "Man, why you always so damn happy when you come to work every day?" Robert replied, "That's because I make love to my wife every morni ...

peiratns you lil suck up. Very Happy

Two blonde girls were working for the city public works department. One would dig a hole and the other would follow behind her and fill the hole in. They worked up one side of the street, then down th ...