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cyberval

Thu 02 Mar, 2006


The Wife From Hell

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A police officer pulls over a speeding car.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> The officer says,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"I clocked you at 80 miles per hour,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> sir.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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The driver says,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"Gee,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> officer,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> I had it on cruise control at 60,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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Not looking up from her knitting the wife says:<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"Now don't be silly,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> dear,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> you know that this car doesn't have cruise control.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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As the officer writes out the ticket,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> the driver looks over at his wife and growls,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once?<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> The wife smiles demurely and says,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"Darn it,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> woman,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> can't you keep your mouth shut?<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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The officer frowns and says,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> sir.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> That's an automatic <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>$75 fine.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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The driver says,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"Yeah,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> well,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> you see officer,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> I had it on,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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The wife says,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"Now,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> dear,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> You never wear your seat belt when you're driving.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"WHY DON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP?<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>?<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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The officer looks over at the woman and asks,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"Does your husband always talk to you this way,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> Ma'am?<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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I love this part.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"Only when he's been drinking.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>


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omgwtfhax

Thu 02 Mar, 2006


Re: The Wife From Hell

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LMFAO HAHAHAHAHHA owned like a bitch.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>


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hbgator

Fri 03 Mar, 2006


Re: The Wife From Hell

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great one <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>:D