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Jah Ji
Sat 08 Dec, 2007

Hysterical ---- First date
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First Date<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
If you didn't see this on the Tonight show,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> I hope you're sitting down when you read it.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> This is probably the funniest date story ever,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> first date or not!<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>!<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>!<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> The winner described her worst first date experience.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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She said it was midwinter.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> Snowing and quite cold.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.and the guy had taken her skii!<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> ng in the mountains outside Salt Lake City,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> Utah.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> It was a day trip <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>(no overnight)<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> They were strangers,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> after all,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> and truly had never met before.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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They were driving back down the mountain,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> middle of nowhere!<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> Her companion suggested she try to hold it,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> which she did for a while.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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Unfortunately,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> because of the heavy snow and slow going,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her go beside the road,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> or it would be the front seat of his car.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> yanked her pants down and started.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> In the deep snow she didn't have good footing,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>!<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> Upon finishing however,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> she soon became aware of another sensation.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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As she bent to pull up her pants,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> she answered her date's concerns about <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"what is taking so long"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> with a reply that indeed,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> she was <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"freezing her butt off"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> and in need of some assistance!<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> as she looked imploringly into his eyes,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> he burst out laughing.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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She too,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> they assessed her dilemma.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> Obviously,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> as hysterical as the situation was,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> they also were faced with a real problem.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>!<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> grip of the <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> icy metal!<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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So,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> as she looked the other way,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> her first-time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> As the audience screamed in laughter,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> she took the Tonight Show prize hands down.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> Or perhaps thatshould be <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"pants down.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> And you thought your first date was embarrassing.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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Jay Leno's comment.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed!<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> off.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>"<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
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Oh,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> and how did the first date turn out?<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> He became her husband and wassitting next to her on the Leno show.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>

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jkf
Sat 08 Dec, 2007

Re: Hysterical ---- First date
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They probably were pr0n actors and it was in<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
the script for a sicko watersport fetish movie.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b><b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>(He was empty after the first take but didn't want to kiss her<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
ass off goodbye,<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> so he ended up as her permanent buttlick.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>.<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>)<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b> <b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>:lol:<b style="color:#FFA34F"></b>
